08.16.09
I need to get back to normal. I have hardly eaten anything solid since The Day, and even then I can't keep it down for more than an hour or so. I have been able to keep down a few slim fast drinks. After another random bout of moping, I was suddenly famished today. I didn't know what to do, as my stomach quit growling days ago. I wandered through the kitchen, and ended up deciding on dry cheerios, as they were the only thing that didn't make my stomach turn. Not more than an hour after I had eaten (and thrown up) a handful of cheerios, I was watching television and saw a commercial for chicken strips. I wanted them. Really, really wanted them. I took this as a sign from above. I cooked myself some chicken nuggets. I ate four of them! It was great, I felt like I actually had energy. I did throw them up later, but it was at least three hours until I did.
I am exhausted all the time. I just want to sleep, but when I finally do around midnight or one AM, I have nightmares then wake up really early and can't fall back asleep because my mind is racing. What? Where? WHY? I just want to be able to eat a normal meal and sleep all the way through the night, and feel happy again. I fear that will take months, or maybe even years.
I need to get back to normal. I have hardly eaten anything solid since The Day, and even then I can't keep it down for more than an hour or so. I have been able to keep down a few slim fast drinks. After another random bout of moping, I was suddenly famished today. I didn't know what to do, as my stomach quit growling days ago. I wandered through the kitchen, and ended up deciding on dry cheerios, as they were the only thing that didn't make my stomach turn. Not more than an hour after I had eaten (and thrown up) a handful of cheerios, I was watching television and saw a commercial for chicken strips. I wanted them. Really, really wanted them. I took this as a sign from above. I cooked myself some chicken nuggets. I ate four of them! It was great, I felt like I actually had energy. I did throw them up later, but it was at least three hours until I did.
I am exhausted all the time. I just want to sleep, but when I finally do around midnight or one AM, I have nightmares then wake up really early and can't fall back asleep because my mind is racing. What? Where? WHY? I just want to be able to eat a normal meal and sleep all the way through the night, and feel happy again. I fear that will take months, or maybe even years.
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