08.20.09
My journal entry today was a single line that read, "I stand strong against the wind, it's the only thing I can do."
I'm learning to take life one day at a time. Now that the big things are handled, the divorce details, where I will live, and I am pretty sure I will have a job before I move.
I ate a full meal yesterday. And I kept it down. I ate lunch today, and it stayed down as well. I'm improving. I am learning to calm myself down when life begins to feel too much. Sunlight is very helpful. I have a large backyard, though it is full with my garden that has unfortunately died. I have begun going into the back yard and sitting in my camping chair and turning my face to the sky. I remind myself that this sun will be the same, whether I live here, or somewhere else, or if I am alone or with somebody I love. It's small, but it's a constant I can count on. I soak up the vitamins and breath deeply. It calms me. And my face is getting tan.
I've learned other little things to do when life closes in. Reading is the best escape ever. I am not one to run away from my problems, but nothing is hurt by letting my body relax and live through the eyes of a great character in a novel.
I am also finding a therapist. I feel like I am coming out of this marriage with great insecurities, and I do not want them to hurt me if I ever get into another relationship. I intend to remarry, and when I do I do not want to screw it up.
My journal entry today was a single line that read, "I stand strong against the wind, it's the only thing I can do."
I'm learning to take life one day at a time. Now that the big things are handled, the divorce details, where I will live, and I am pretty sure I will have a job before I move.
I ate a full meal yesterday. And I kept it down. I ate lunch today, and it stayed down as well. I'm improving. I am learning to calm myself down when life begins to feel too much. Sunlight is very helpful. I have a large backyard, though it is full with my garden that has unfortunately died. I have begun going into the back yard and sitting in my camping chair and turning my face to the sky. I remind myself that this sun will be the same, whether I live here, or somewhere else, or if I am alone or with somebody I love. It's small, but it's a constant I can count on. I soak up the vitamins and breath deeply. It calms me. And my face is getting tan.
I've learned other little things to do when life closes in. Reading is the best escape ever. I am not one to run away from my problems, but nothing is hurt by letting my body relax and live through the eyes of a great character in a novel.
I am also finding a therapist. I feel like I am coming out of this marriage with great insecurities, and I do not want them to hurt me if I ever get into another relationship. I intend to remarry, and when I do I do not want to screw it up.
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