08.10.09
I knew I had to tell everybody. I figured the sooner the better, since I knew I would need a large network of support. Plus, I didn’t want there to be any rumors, I wanted to be open and honest about what was going on. Sunday night my friends and I had a beach bonfire trip planned. My one friend who knew what had happened drove, and we made the 45 minute drive out to Oceanside. I hadn’t exactly figured out how to tell everybody. I really hate telling bad news, not because I don’t like sharing, but because I hate to be a downer on the evening.
I pulled aside one of my closest friends and listened to her talk for a while, as we walked down the beach. Eventually, she asked how I was doing. I paused. “Well…” I had a difficult time continuing, as tears began to roll down my face. I was thankful it was dark, and also surprised I still had tears left. I blurted out, “He left me and we are getting a divorce.” Her reaction was not unexpected, first shock, then concern for me, then anger towards him. It was like the entire grieving process in about five minutes.
I still couldn’t figure out how to tell the other couple there, other close friends of mine. I don’t remember how, but we ended up in a car together, and gave them the news. Their reaction was more unexpected. “Jackass.” The husband proclaimed, along with other expletives that degraded my husband’s sexual anatomy. That was a nice, needed comic relief. I relaxed a little, and was able to field a lot of questions, few of which I were able to answer.
I ate the first piece of food in over 24 hours, a hot dog cooked over the fire. Three hours later, I threw it up. I didn’t even feel hungry, though the sickness I felt in my stomach had been turning since the night before. One more hard part hurdled, an infinite amount to go.
I knew I had to tell everybody. I figured the sooner the better, since I knew I would need a large network of support. Plus, I didn’t want there to be any rumors, I wanted to be open and honest about what was going on. Sunday night my friends and I had a beach bonfire trip planned. My one friend who knew what had happened drove, and we made the 45 minute drive out to Oceanside. I hadn’t exactly figured out how to tell everybody. I really hate telling bad news, not because I don’t like sharing, but because I hate to be a downer on the evening.
I pulled aside one of my closest friends and listened to her talk for a while, as we walked down the beach. Eventually, she asked how I was doing. I paused. “Well…” I had a difficult time continuing, as tears began to roll down my face. I was thankful it was dark, and also surprised I still had tears left. I blurted out, “He left me and we are getting a divorce.” Her reaction was not unexpected, first shock, then concern for me, then anger towards him. It was like the entire grieving process in about five minutes.
I still couldn’t figure out how to tell the other couple there, other close friends of mine. I don’t remember how, but we ended up in a car together, and gave them the news. Their reaction was more unexpected. “Jackass.” The husband proclaimed, along with other expletives that degraded my husband’s sexual anatomy. That was a nice, needed comic relief. I relaxed a little, and was able to field a lot of questions, few of which I were able to answer.
I ate the first piece of food in over 24 hours, a hot dog cooked over the fire. Three hours later, I threw it up. I didn’t even feel hungry, though the sickness I felt in my stomach had been turning since the night before. One more hard part hurdled, an infinite amount to go.
No comments:
Post a Comment