It's been a really busy week for me, but I thought I would put up an update before I head to work tonight. First the news you are waiting for ( know you are, my email inbox has never been so full): My date with the fireman. It was pretty good, well, really good actually. I'm not going to list a lot of details here out of respect for him, but I had a really good time. I was nervous, but he put me at ease really quickly. I discovered that the things I was worried I'd lost, or worse, never had, came back easily. Having not really dated in nearly eleven years, this is truly a whole new world for me. Being older, more mature, and realizing that anybody I date is pretty much a potential mate is a lot of pressure. As a teenager, dating is for fun, you don't care where it goes, and because you are experiencing the deepest feelings of your life, you are constantly "in love" with various guys. Now it's...too easy to find you don't like the guy and don't want to be there.
All the while, you have to be able to back-burner that knowledge because if you don't dating would be this horrible uptight experience and none of us would ever make it past the first date. And I did that much more easily than I expected and found that I rather liked him. Please don't email me asking if this is "the one," It is ridiculously too early to tell, but for now I will have fun seeing him. I had been a little worried that he wouldn't call, but he did this afternoon after I got out of class and we set up another date.
The last week has been really stressful, starting with Saturday and it really has not stopped yet. Tuesday it felt like the world was caving in on top of me, Wednesday was good but I was out really late, about 2AM, and I had to be at work at five AM thursday. I had to go straight from there to my ex husbands house, which I was stressed over but en the end I came out feeling okay. From there to school and back home. A quick chat on the phone with Jacob, a visit with a friend and some dinner and off to bed. Shower, dress, repeat. I don't get off work until 10:30 tonight but I plan to come home and relax in my hammock, it's my favorite thing to do right now.
Even with being so busy, and the added stress of drama, life is still good. It's the life I've chosen. I've chosen to take on extra responsibilities. I've chosen to take 18 units at school. I've chosen to be there for my friends. I wouldn't have it any other way. I get my rewards.
No comments:
Post a Comment